Bring A Rowboat

So moving back to a more rural community has its perks.

One of those perks is that you sometimes don’t need to have a garden of your own to benefit from farm fresh produce. And when I say farm fresh, I mean there are times that friends will call and say that whatever you pick, you get to keep, because their crops have produced more than they can handle. You just can’t get fresher than that.

My sister has been in green bean purgatory, because she’s been doing nothing but snapping and canning green beans for weeks. My neighbor offered up some really great rhubarb a few weeks ago. And this weekend, I got two calls asking if I wanted sweet corn.

I love sweet corn. I love corn on the cob, especially if its grilled in the husk. And canned corn just never quite tastes the same, probably because my parents had a garden when I was a kid, and I remember watching Mom cut it off the cobs to freeze for the winter. It just tastes better when it’s home grown. Something about it being crisper, even after months in the freezer. I remember husking corn as a kid. I hated it (and still do), but it’s worth the effort because it’s just that good.

So when my cousin’s wife called and offered me some of her corn, my thought had been to grill some and freeze some, and I was pretty happy. She brought me a a little over a dozen ears of corn. That would have made a nice dinner for me and a friend and probably enough for a single freezer portion for later. I held it for Saturday night.

I called my mother on Saturday, and she told me that a family friend had called and told her to come get some sweet corn from her field. I offered to come and help her, hoping to snag a little for myself. I hadn’t been planning to be out in a cornfield. I was in capris and a nice shirt and flip flop sandals, having just come from a writer’s meeting at the Mechanicsburg library. I grew up in the country; I know that’s not really farm attire.

That being said, we weren’t going to be out there long. The plan was to fill two decent sized boxes, go back to Mom’s house, divvy them up and start shucking and cutting and boiling corn for freezing. It shouldn’t take more than fifteen or twenty minutes to fill those boxes, so I didn’t run back to my house for sturdier footwear or appropriate clothing. That decision came back to haunt me later.

We got out to the field, and realized that there had been others picking as well; we needed to get deeper into the rows to get to ears that were ripe enough for picking. We left the boxes on the ground on the edge of the field and headed into the rows, bringing out armloads of corn to fill the boxes on the ground. Just as we were headed in for our last armloads, the skies opened and it began to rain. Hard. In fact, it was raining harder than I’d seen it rain for a long time. It rained hard enough that it felt like we were standing in the middle of a waterfall.

I didn’t get very far. I’d grabbed the larger box and the bottom fell out of it, sending all of those ears of corn to the ground. Mom scooped up some, and I grabbed an armload and the box, so that we could at least put the bigger box back together in the back of the car and fill it, using the one that was still intact to go back after the rest of the corn we’d picked. We slipped and slid out of our shoes as we went up and down the embankment, grabbing the rest of what we’d picked. Mom turned the car around, and we got in, soaked clear through.

My hair was so wet, it looked like I’d just gotten out of the shower. I couldn’t see anything, because the lenses to my glasses were dripping with water. Mom’s mascara was running, and it was raining so hard that we could hardly see out the windshield with the wipers on high. Mom asked me to reach in the glove compartment because she kept, in her words, “a whole bunch” of paper napkins in there, and maybe we could wipe off our faces.

There was one napkin.

I gave it to her since she was driving, and tried to wipe off my glasses with the hem of my sopping wet shirt. Needless to say, it didn’t work well, especially because I was laughing so hard I was crying.

Less than four miles down the road, the rain quit as abruptly as if someone had shut off a faucet. The roadway was bone dry. We dissolved into giggles again, and by the time we got back to her house, we hadn’t stopped laughing yet. Our shoes were making wet sloppy squishy noises as we unloaded the car, and divided up the corn.

I ended up taking my share and going home. I don’t live with my folks, don’t have any clothes there, and Mom and I don’t wear the same size. Getting into dry clothes was only going to happen if I drove home. I hauled all that corn back to my house, and put it all on the kitchen table for the night. I didn’t even want to look at it. Luckily someone else offered to make me dinner last night, and I was only too happy to accept.

Today I shucked it, cut it, and boiled it. I’m waiting now for it to cool enough to portion out for freezer portions. I ended up giving someone else some of my haul, and still ended up cutting and cooking nearly three dozen ears. It smelled so good that when it was done boiling, I had to spoon up a bowl for a late lunch for myself.

And yes, it was all worth it. It’s just as good as I remember.

I’ll just have to remember to take a rowboat the next time.

My hiatus

I want to apologize for not posting, and I’ll tell you why.

I really am trying to post more often than I have been but the last month or so has been difficult to do so.

At the end of June, I went to Cedar Point in Sandusky, Ohio, with a close friend.

In the beginning of July, I went to Gatlinburg, Tennessee, with my parents, my sister and her family, and my brother.

I came back after all of that travel to work insanity, a yard that is still exploding in growth, a family garage sale to prepare for and work, a house in need of the spring cleaning I’d been putting off (hey I’ve only lived in the house a year…I figured I got a little leeway this year!), and the writing fell by the wayside while I was struggling to get everything else done. (Hint…it’s still not all done, but I’m getting closer!)

There are a few reasons you didn’t hear from me with all of the travel and business and etc. Here they are:

1) I’m not gonna post about travel plans before I go. Not only is it not safe, but I’ve done a lot of work on this house. There’s been a lot of painting and cleaning and otherwise sweat equity put in. I would be really upset if something happened to my house while I was gone. I’ve started giving more thought to this. I have a mystery writing conference coming up where I will be appearing on a panel…I’d like to post about it, but I just don’t like advertising that I’m out of town. As soon as I finish making arrangements for the house and the cat, I’ll make the decision on whether or not to post about it.

2) I’ve got a lot of writing making the rounds at the moment. I’m in the pattern right now of waiting on submissions and working on a new project. The point there is that there really hasn’t been a lot of news to report, so you haven’t heard much from me.

3) The day job pays the bills. The writing does not at the moment. When the day job goes insane, the writing must be set aside to deal with the day job. Believe me, I can’t stay away from it for long; I’ll always come back to it. In fact, I’m looking forward to finishing the yardwork this weekend so that I can get more wordcount. There’s also been the issue of figuring out the next step in the plot, and I think I’ve got a direction to go at the moment.

Now that most of that seems to be coming under control, I’m hoping to post more often.

Appetites

So I was at work this morning, working on a research memo for the boss, and all of a sudden, I was starving.

I didn’t want to heat up and eat my lunch at 1030 a.m., and I hadn’t had much breakfast. I thought maybe I would get up and stretch a bit, open a Diet Coke (because my blood-Diet Coke level was low, of course!) and see if getting something to drink would help.

It didn’t. The next thing I knew, I was ready to gnaw off my own arm. Food was rapidly becoming necessary.

I finally gave in and snagged some change out of my drawer and headed to the junk machine. I bought some chips and headed back to my desk.

When I got back to my desk, I took a couple of bites of chips and started typing. I didn’t look up for a while, but the memo got done and put on his desk, and I moved on to another research project fairly quickly. Before I knew it, the lunch hour was gone, and I had about thirteen minutes before my next hearing.

I’ve got a bit of a complex about being early for hearings. If I’m not fifteen minutes early for a hearing, I feel like I’m running late. I changed my shoes (’cause I keep my heels under my desk and I take them off for slip-on Skecher’s Mary Jane style shoes when I’m not in court) and ran for the courtroom (up one whole flight of stairs; it’s really not that far). I had one hearing today, which didn’t take long, and went back to the office to immerse myself in the current projects on my desk.

I left early tonight to visit a scene that is the subject of an upcoming trial, so I spent a couple of hours tromping around in the woods to see the scene, and then came home to mow the yard, do some weeding, play with the cat, spend some time on the phone with family and friends and sit down to write. The rest of the evening has pretty much evaporated.

So now, it’s 1010 p.m., and I just realized that I haven’t had anything to eat since that partial bag of chips at 1030 am. And I could eat, but I’m not starving. I probably won’t eat much tonight because it’s so late, but it amazes me that I was so hungry this morning, and right now I could probably go to bed with nothing and be just fine with that.

Anyone else ever do this?

Thank Goodness It’s Friday!

My string of strange and weird things for the week continues…

I have an interesting fight with multiple pairs of pantyhose. I’ve thrown away five pairs this week.

My sinuses still aren’t recovered from the mysterious allergy/conference yuck. It’s been four weeks and I’m still wondering when someone will see me walk through the door and think “Attack of the Phlegm Creature” as opposed to “Oh, it’s Addie.” I should buy stock in Kleenex.

My flowerbeds are in serious need of help. The fishpond in my backyard is a nightmare. And I haven’t been able to get to it becuase of all the rain we’ve had this week.

I drove all the way to Dayton last night for my critique group meeting only to realize that I’d left my critiques and notes on my desk at work.

I got to work this morning thinking I’d write a check to our admin assistant for the lunch she’d covered for me the other day since I rarely carry cash. I was out of checks in my checkbook.

I promised someone that we’d grill steaks tonight on my new grill. Guess what didn’t make it out of the freezer to defrost during the day?

I’m ready for this week to be over. Anyone else out there feel the same way?

Romantic Times 2010

I’ve been meaning to post my impression of the Romantic Times conference that I attended just a couple of weeks ago.

There were some very good things about the conference. There were some things that were concerns, but those concerns were, for the most part, not within the control of the people who planned and administered the conference itself; they were issues with the conference center.

The Good

The truth is that this conference was very well-run, and I met loads of people. Some of the people I spoke with are people I’ve met at other conferences. I did quite a bit of networking and went to some very interesting seminars. I did learn some new things, and have new ideas for the projects I’m working on. I’d go again, hands down.

If you write anything with romantic elements, or write romantic fiction, you should really check out the Romantic Times conference. It will be in LA next year, which sounds like a great time. I don’t know if I will attend, largely because of the amount of travel, travel expenses, and not knowing my own trial schedule that far in advance, but I’d love to go again if I could!

And let’s hear it for Mr. Romance, 2010….a very good-looking Midwestern boy named Jamie Ungaro, from Coshocton OHIO!! Gotta love those Midwestern country boys…I know I like them a lot myself!

The Bad

The air quality inside the conference center and the hotel was abysmal. Yes, the conference was held in Ohio. Yes, I live in Ohio, too. It is definitely Allergy Alley. There’s no question that there was a lot of sniffing and coughing going on as the conference started, but it got worse as the week went on. Despite the early snuffles, we got a heavy rainstorm partway through the week. Rain normally clears a lot of crap out of the air when pollen counts are high, but the allergy suffering kept getting worse. I had trouble sleeping at the hotel all week, and overheard many others complaining about the same problems.

I was amazed at how much better I felt the minute I got in my car to leave and turned on the air conditioner. That’s rather sad.

There’s a lot of joking that goes around at different conferences about the “conference yuck” or the “conference plague”; the unspecified upper respiratory infection that always cuts a large swath through attendees at a large conference of any kind. I didn’t really hear a lot of it this time; most of the people having problems were the ones with allergies. I’m still getting over it, and I’ve been back a week and a half.

Regrets

There were quite a few agents and editors there.

In my opinion, the general rule of thumb for pitching in person at a conference is this; if you can’t have the finished product out the door in 30 days, don’t pitch your project. You can sign up for pitch appointments and network, but if you do this, you should make sure that the person from the conference organizing the pitch appointments is aware of this, so that they can determine if the agents and editors are okay with this. You don’t end up annoying editors and agents who don’t want to hear from people who do not have finished or almost-finished product to market.  Also, it’s just good business networking to make sure that you’re not stepping on any toes. Remember that you can always network at the bar, or at the social events as opposed to at the pitch appointments. I sure did a lot of that.

Because I did not feel like I could have GRIMM out the door in 30 days (It’s slow going right now…I’m in research hell at the moment, and scenes are dragging until I get it done) I did not sign up to pitch. I really wish I’d had a project ready to go.  SHADES OF GRAY isn’t something I’m sending out right now, but I’ve had some ideas for rewrites, and so I’m making another editing pass through it right now. Of course, I have no way of predicting which one could be done in 30 days, so I did not pitch either. I wish I’d felt like I had something to pitch. It would have been a great opportunity to do so!

If you’re starting to plan your writing-related travel for next year, I would strongly recommend the Romantic Times convention. We had a ball, made great connections, got lots of ideas for more writing, and got great career advice. At this point, the link for next year’s conference is not yet up, but you can check out this year’s information here.

Happy Mom’s Day

Hope all you moms out there had a great day.

I had two mother’s day celebrations to attend today. At the second, we had planned to work on my grandmother’s flowerbeds for the afternoon. This has become a yearly tradition. She loves her flowerbeds, and we generally use Mother’s Day as the excuse to do all the spring edging and weeding and planting for her. My brother and sister and I all end up going together to get her a couple of flats of impatiens, and I end up spending the day planting them in a pattern in one of her flowerbeds while the others dig and weed and thin all the overgrowth from the year before.

This year, we weren’t able to get it all done because of the lack of cooperation from Mother Nature. It was actually pretty cold out there today, and it was difficult to work in the shade. We got some of the work done, and will have to go back as our schedules allow over the next week or two to get the rest done. I think Grandma’s actually happier about that; she got to spend the day with all of us, and we’ll all come back again to get it done, as opposed to one long marathon of work today.

I’ve got a long to-do list over the next couple of weeks, but I’m hoping that I can get plenty of time set aside not only to finish Grandma’s flowerbed, but my own as well.

Happy Mother’s Day!

On an unrelated note, please light a candle, say a prayer, and keep in your thoughts all those in Nashville who are struggling to deal with the flood waters and the damage that’s followed the water. I know I certainly can’t help but think about all of those moms and families who were not able to observe Mother’s Day because of the current turmoil in their lives.

Dayton Wine Trail Pics

Okay, so I promised some time ago to put these up, but I just hadn’t quite gotten there yet.  And since they’re doing this again on May 15, I hope this gives you some idea of how much fun we had, and a desire to go and check things out! www.daytonwinetrail.com

And this is not a comment on the taste or quality of any of the products here…the labels just cracked us up.

  The Squid’s Fist. Because when I think wine…I think squid. And not just any squid, but a squid that actually has a hand and fingers that can make a fist. Yeah, that says a good wine to go with seafood or chicken. Doesn’t it say that to you?

I have a hard time equating good wine with something that even Jules Verne couldn’t dream up.

This could be the best wine on the planet. I can’t stop trying to picture how a squid makes a fist.

Menage A Trois. Is this some way of saying that wine is supposed to dictate bedroom behavior?

I couldn’t take this seriously. Yeah, I know. We were cracking up like a couple of really immature grade school kids who laugh at fart jokes.

But seriously, are you really thinking about whether this is a good dessert wine, or what kind of taste it leaves on the palate? Nope. I’m wanting to know what the marketing campaign is going to be.

And the wine labels weren’t the only crazy thing. The beer labels had us going too.

Oaked Arrogant Bastard Ale. Nothing says tasty ale like an arrogant bastard. Or is this medication to treat Arrogant Bastard Syndrome? Or is it a way to create Arrogant Bastards? Probably the latter.

I’m sure we all know people we’d like to give this to, especially if it cures Arrogant Bastard tendencies.  And does the fact that it’s oaked make it extra strength or something?

Someone told me that this stuff is actually pretty good. I can’t get past the label. And how would you give a six pack of this to someone with a straight face? Much less serve a bottle of it to a guest in your house? Wouldn’t they think you were trying to make some kind of statement about their personality?

Old Rasputin Russian Imperial Stout. And, because nothing says beer like crusty, unwashed Russian holy men/crazy men/however you’d like to classify this nutball.

Seriously? Because I’d worry that this would turn me into a crazy Russian religious maniac who didn’t bathe, didn’t shave, and thought he was God’s gift to the world. And women.

Although, they did have to shoot him, stab him, strangle him, poison him, and drown him before he actually died. Even so, I would definitely give up the whole Holy Man of Steel concept for regular bathing. I just can’t handle the not-bathing thing.

Again, might be great beer. I just can’t figure out what the ad campaign would be. And that’s really what’s keeping me from trying it.

These are really the pick of the litter here. I’ll post more great alcohol labels as I find them. Enjoy!

The Pantyhose Conspiracy

I should have bought stock in pantyhose years ago, or at least bought as many pairs of the good kind as I could afford back when they were sturdier than they are now.

 In my job, I wear suits on an almost daily basis. There are many days that I cannot wear pantsuits. (Don’t ask; just know that I’m not allowed.) This means that I go through a lot of pantyhose. And yes, I do mean literally “go through” pantyhose: I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve gotten runs in them right when I don’t have the time to do anything about it, or when I’m in a hurry.

 I’ve tried using lingerie bags in the washing machine. I’ve tried washing them by hand. It really doesn’t matter; they always run. And they always run exactly two days before payday when you don’t have time to get to the store and are down to your last pair. And then you put on the emergency pair that you keep in the back of your desk drawer only to put your hand through the knee on a day that is already spiraling downhill in a hurry.

 I’m beginning to believe that Someone invented pantyhose, like high heels, just to get a good laugh at all of us crazy women who are trying to be “fashionable”. Or they’re getting a good laugh at all of us wrapping our legs in nylon sausage casing before we show them off. Have you ever watched a woman put on pantyhose? We look like absolute fools when we go through all of those gyrations.

 Can you tell I’m having issues today?